My Pensieve

people, not even lovers will completely understand certain things about you.  most especially when you are of opposite worlds.

i say this not only to convince myself that i’ve completely moved on, but also to open the hearts of many who still close their doors to certainties that goes on in another person’s mind.

no one is perfect.  i can never be the perfect one for you, as your friend, as your family, as your lover, as your husband, not even as you.  you cannot expect me to be the person you want me to be.

"you can always find another person to love, but not another self"

a very special person once told me this.  you don’t have to change your ways for another person.  you just have to completely understand and completely accept the person for being such.

…interim

beware all you who hurt my family!

with this knot, i seal this hex

you  will not sleep, you will not rest.

knots of anger, knots of hate,

discord brings you to your fate.

i tie this second knot, makes two,

bringing darkness over you.

slander, discord, evil too

brining darkness straight to you.

with this third knot i do bind,

weaving chaos in your mind

hex of anger, hex of hate

bring you THEM down, i will not wait.

so mote it be, now made manifest.

It’s been a while since i last updated my blog, and a lot has happened.

you know im talking about you, in case you’re reading this.  You tell me you’re scared, but i don’t see any difference between before and now.

i honestly just don’t get it.

and what? you’re scared i may never contact you again? c’mon, get back to reality.  you know me better than that.

i just don’t understand how your mind goes anymore… or maybe im just plain stupid…

for all the trouble i’ve caused, i’m sorry, and like i’ve told you, that will be the last time im calling you that.

thanks and i really hope you’re better and happy.

but i guess i thought wrong.  don’t think i’m gonna explain.  im tired of explaining.

i’m not expecting you to run after me, i know you’re tired of doing that too.  you simply don’t understand me.

just simply that.

i told you because i thought you’d understand me. i thought you’re gonna help me.  i’m sorry if it seemed like i insinuated that it’s your fault.

i told you because you are important and i want you to know what’s going on and what’s happening.

but i guess you took it differently.  to me, you took it defensively.  i just wanted you to be aware, so you could prepare for anything.

you simply just don’t understand me.

but i guess i thought wrong.  don’t think i’m gonna explain.  im tired of explaining.

i’m not expecting you to run after me, i know you’re tired of doing that too.  you simply don’t understand me.

just simply that.

i told you because i thought you’d understand me. i thought you’re gonna help me.  i’m sorry if it seemed like i insinuated that it’s your fault.

i told you because you are important and i want you to know what’s going on ad what’s happening.

but i guess you took it differently.  to me, you took it defensively.  i just wanted you to be aware, so you could prepare for anything.

you simply just don’t understand me.

finally i’ve given my self a present for all the hard work i have done!!! whew! just sooo happy i wanna share it with you!

TC peeps!

finally it’s my off!!! i’ve been rying to look for sometime for myself, and boy, it’s been giving me headache.  how have my friends been? well hope they’re all ok.

the last movie i saw was harry potter.  didn’ like the new dumbledorebut the dragons were given justice.  well, that was just one dragon though. hekhekhek.

as you all know, i was about to pursue a career in a different company, until i’ve been transferred to a different account.  they say this account is a promising one.  Let’s all cross our fingers that it is so.

ei guys! missed my blogs? hehehe, well one of the most obvious reasons for such is that im caught up with piles of work in the office.

was actually good to see some of my friends during my god son’s birthday party last sunday… enjoyed a few chat and laughs, but i would say it still wasn’t enough. we’ve got a lot to discuss here and there…

by the way, im missin some of my other friends, really, hope you’re all doing fine, specially those i haven’t heard from for quite a time…

kamusta naman ang mga UST area friends ko diba? hehehe,

till next time!

but then again, everything seemed to go on well…
i never thought it was gonna be this way…
i hope you do forgive me for my shortcomings…

again and over i say, i won’t force you…
please just tell me… please?
it’s breaking my heart to bear this burden…
thinking of what may be the result of my negligence…

i am at fault…
i was wrong…
i am sorry…

as promised, i will stay, for as long as you want me to…
but until the time you come back…
i will be here…

i won’t let go…
please be back…
please?

after a very long time! finally i have been given the opportunity to update my blog! whew!  friendster and other sites have been blocked by our company being one of the reasons aside from the hopeless toxicity we encounter in the office everyday of our lives!

what’s new? well a lot… i’ll post some more.  i think it’s inappropriate for me to mention it here… hehehe